Garage Sale Love & Hate

I always say, "This is the last garage sale I'm having". Of course my husband rolls his knowing eyes, because it won't be my last and he is completely sure of that. To be honest, I know that it won't be, but in my defense I am hoping that it might be.

Garage sales and I have a love / hate thing going on. I can save, price, and pack away like it was an art or an Olympic sport. I take my time for months, just finding this and that throughout the house. Scanning my house as I clean or put away laundry. Planning is so easy and that ease hooks me every time. I get lost in the planning only to slowly start to dread the garage sale as the date begins to creep up.

First of all I want to know who decided garage sales were going to start so early in the morning? Ummm, that requires one to get up even earlier to finish prepping or like a lot of people, to finish pricing and to drag the crap out to the driveway. The crack of dawn is unsympathetic to all those that don't naturally get up before the roosters. No matter how early I "plan" to go to sleep, I am no more useful at 4:45 a.m., than if I were still asleep.

Secondly, I hate early birds that show up despite the no early bird statement added to the ad that they read to find out about the damn garage sale. I know they read it, but they come by anyway in some hopes that I will allow the very early birds I said I didn't want to deal with. Sorry you don't know that I am that kind of person and I will tell you not to come in. In my head I'm telling you to jump up my butt, because I'm freakin tired and your rudeness is rushing me, which makes me pissy. I'm pretty sure I don't need your money and now don't want it.

Thirdly, oh how I hate having to deal with tards who want my stuff for free. Did I put it out at the curb? Does it have a free sign on it? I think its bullshit to haggle on a mint condition men's Polo shirt that's marked 2.00! Really? What moron doesn't know that Polo retails for a few bucks more than 2.00? You don't have to know it's in the neighborhood of 68.00, but I expect you to use your brain. How about the lady that bitched about the 8.00 priced Brighton kitten heeled sandals that clearly had a perfect sole and the original price tag of 135.00 still on it. She wanted to give me 50 cents! My garage sales are not full of trash. I take care of my things and price them well below anything you could pay new or used on Ebay. It just drives me nuts! I have people haggling me over items priced 50 cents. They want to give me less on every price, if they can. Do these people think they are pros, experts or ready to pen a how to book, because they can save a quarter here and fifty cents there at garage sales? What an inspiring feat!

Lastly, I simple don't look forward to dealing with anything that doesn't sell. I don't want to take it home, so I have to load it up in the car and drive it to the local Goodwill. Yes, Goodwill is better than tossing the stuff in the trash, but Goodwill has done some things that I don't agree with. I'd rather give to the Salvation Army, but they have sucky hours and there isn't an after hours box or bin I can use.

So, why do I keep having garage sales? I guess we have a lot of stuff and making some money back ain't too shabby.